CoDA Steps 7 & 8 Reflection Group

Ask for volunteers to read the following:

As we pursue our recovery, it is important for each of us to speak, as we are able. Many of us find speaking among others, especially strangers, a very difficult task. We encourage people to begin slowly and carefully.

It is the intention of every CoDA member and group not to ridicule or embarrass anyone. Nothing that is shared is unimportant or stupid. The sharing of our experiences is best done with “I” statements. “Crosstalk” and “feedback” are discouraged.

What is Crosstalk?

Crosstalk can include giving unsolicited feedback, advice-giving, answering, making “you” and “we” statements, interrogating, debating, criticizing, controlling, or dominating. It may also include minimizing another person’s feelings or experiences, physical contact or touch, body movements such as nodding one’s head, calling another person present by name, or verbal sounds and noises.

Commitment

• Group begins promptly at 7:00 PM EST.
• Please arrive on time and ready to participate.
• Coming in late can disrupt the safety, flow, and connection of the group.
• Consistency and commitment are important to the healing process.
• If you miss more than two meetings, we kindly ask that you sign up for another future group when you are able to fully commit.

Reflection

This group is an opportunity to practice mindful listening, self-awareness, emotional honesty, and willingness.

As others share, we encourage you to:

• Listen with compassion and without judgment.
• Notice what emotions, thoughts, memories, or reactions arise within you.
• Reflect on how you identify with the shares and what truths may be surfacing for your own recovery.
• Share from your personal experience rather than giving advice or fixing others.

In keeping with CoDA’s 7th Tradition, this group is fully self-supporting. While there are no dues or fees, we do have expenses, and contributions are appreciated.

A one-time suggested donation of $20 is welcome for this series. If you’re unable to give, please keep coming back — your presence matters more than your contribution.

Serenity Seven is a seven-week CoDA reflection group focused on Steps 7 and 8. Step 7 invites us into humility, surrender, trust, and willingness. Step 8 invites us into accountability, compassion, and becoming willing to make amends.

This group helps members explore the patterns, fears, defenses, shame, and resistance that can make surrender and willingness difficult. The goal is not perfection, but openness to change, self-compassion, and spiritual growth.

This group may bring up shame, regret, fear, defensiveness, resentment, grief, or resistance. Members are encouraged to be gentle with themselves and take the process one reflection at a time.

Members are invited to:

• Share only what feels safe.
• Pass at any time.
• Avoid giving advice, fixing, rescuing, or analyzing another member’s share.
• Use “I” statements and speak from personal experience.
• Practice grounding before and after difficult reflections.
• Reach out to a sponsor, therapist, trusted recovery friend, or support person if difficult emotions arise.
• Remember that Steps 7 and 8 are about willingness, not perfection.

Each session may be adapted for a 75-minute or 90-minute group. The purpose is not to answer every question perfectly, but to allow each member to choose the questions that most resonate with their recovery.

Step 7 invites us into a deeper level of humility, surrender, and trust. It is a shift from awareness in Step 4 and acceptance in Steps 5 and 6 into willingness — becoming ready to release what no longer serves us.

Core Principles

Suggested Tools for Step 7

• Mindful Breathing: As I breathe in, I am aware of this sensation in my body. As I breathe out, I release this sensation from my body.
• Emotional Awareness: Journaling triggers, thoughts, and feelings.
• Tapping / EFT: Use tapping as a grounding and self-regulation tool.
• CoDA Affirmations: Practice gentle truth statements that support recovery.
• Prayer & Connection: Use prayer as a way to stay connected during emotional intensity.

Step 8 is a bridge between awareness and action. After recognizing our patterns and shortcomings, we begin to take responsibility for how our behaviors have impacted others. This step is not about shame or blame — it is about honesty, willingness, and healing.

Core Principles

Suggested Tools for Step 8

• List-Making Practice: Gently begin writing down the names of individuals you may have harmed.
• Mindful Reflection: Notice emotions that arise — guilt, shame, fear, or resistance — without judgment.
• Journaling: Explore where you acted from fear, control, avoidance, resentment, or people-pleasing.
• Self-Regulation: Use deep breathing, grounding exercises, and affirmations.

Closing Statement