CoDA Compliance Patterns

Believe people are incapable of taking care of themselves.
Attempt to convince others what to think, do, or feel.
Freely offer advice and direction without being asked.
Become resentful when others decline their help or reject their advice.
Lavish gifts and favors on those they want to influence.
Use sexual attention to gain approval and acceptance.
Have to feel needed in order to have a relationship with others.
Demand that their needs be met by others.
Use charm and charisma to convince others of their capacity to be caring and compassionate.
Use blame and shame to exploit others emotionally.
Refuse to cooperate, compromise, or negotiate.
Adopt an attitude of indifference, helplessness, authority, or rage to manipulate outcomes.
Use recovery jargon in an attempt to control the behavior of others.
Pretend to agree with others to get what they want.